When two lives collide, energy must be released. In most cases there are often 2 or 3 of the same thing, so you either hoard like rats or make a solemn promise to discard the vestiges of past lives, trunk junk and other gomi, gimcrack, clutter, chach and jetsam.
Gillian and I spent the good part of the last month creating a mountain in the guest room which served as our staging area. It spilled out into the garage as things tend to do. On Wednesday we contacted the press for the obligatory 3 day run in the paper about our forthcoming garage sale. We posted signs around every local intersection and finally posted to Craig’s list. Good old Craig. I offered a private showing to anyone with cash who wanted to pick through the virgin pile of life detrius before the masses got their working class hands all over our bourgeois garbage. We made a quick $500 before opening morning.
6 am our clock broke the restful slumber of our bed chamber. We quickly got our selves together, cargo pants, wad of singles, coffee, smokes, water and the latent and overt inner and outer Jew.
We broke the seal on the garage at 7 to get things rolling only to find the vultures waiting. We were descended upon by people who wanted to see the junk marched out for first inspection. haggledog was in full effect. I was in full wheel-and-deal mode by 7:15. There was a constant flow of people picking through the piles of clothing, electronics, tools and various household extras.
dollars, fives, tens, twenties almost flew into our coffers. People bought anything and I was glad to package it along with a a story of why it was so exotic and rare. I sold buckets of oxidized nails, brillo, utensils, shorts, nearly everything of little or no value was leaving our property an an amazing pace. Until about 9:15.
There was no tire screech, just a huge bang. I swiveled around to see a little red Saturn being run up the curb, onto the lawn, through a stop sign and into a tree. A woman who had just left the sale (she was looking at a very nice bed frame) had gotten unceremoniously creamed by a carpet cleaning truck. She was launched from the drivers seat nearly out of the passenger side. Even from 50 yards away I could see a lot of blood. I had a moment of clarity, I had to stay and man the sale, I couldn’t leave. At that same time Gillian was ass and elbow over to the crash with towels. I don’t know which but I think they were the Ralph Lauren ones I bought at Bloomingdales a few years back. I needed to replace them anyway.
The fire and rescue squad arrived with alacrity and stabilized the patient. She mentioned not wanting anyone to call 911. I laughed in a shocked sort of way. I could see her skull from my driveway. I doubt not having liability insurance is something to worry about at that time.
The neighbor across the street was giving the homeowner with the new lawn ornament a hard time as he now had the jump on him with regard to the Saturday morning mow. Here on Wysteria lane, things are a little different. Gill got to meet more neighbors as they circled around the conversation piece. As the stable and uninsured patient was wheeled off people dispersed back into their respective homes to call their friends and talk about the thing that happened on their street. I have to wonder if she had just paid us the $100 for the maple bed frame she might not be in the ER right now.
The trade didn’t stop even while they were extricating her from her car. We still wheeled and dealt away the morning. Money changed hands and people left us with things we once held dear. I try not to think about some of the people wearing my shirts. I don’t care too much, its just strange. They don’t know what things transpired whilst those shirts were worn.
At about 11 the tide began to go back out to sea. People were more scarce and the offerings were dwindling. We went into everything must go mode. Things left quickly but we were having less traffic. By 1, the last family arrived. They were convinced that $4 was not too much for buckets of random construction left overs.
We packed up the remaining clutter and sent half of it off to Good Will and the other half to the trash. A few things were saved for an eBay adventure which I will make happen as soon as my feet stop throbbing.
People left there with some junk but on the other hand, there were some amazing deals had. A woman bought a pure silk duvet from us for $5. Paintings worth hundreds went for dollars. The bed frames sold for $50 and a $200 rug left in the back of a truck for $5. Those $5 bills added up to nearly $2000 all said and done.
I did hear people say that their friends told them to stop what they were doing and drive to this garage sale. I think everyone less one person had a good day at six gun trail.
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